********UPDATE 5-13-10***************
We found out today that delivery is set for Tuesday, June 1st at 8:00 am. Thank you for the continued prayers and support. It has been so wonderful to have so many friends and family by our side as we have been on this journey. Thank you doesn't seem like enough.
**********Original Post***************
We went back to Vanderbilt today for our last ultrasound before our delivery. Anderson appears to be weighing in right now at a hefty 6 lbs 7 oz. I am almost 35 weeks, so technically should still have 5 weeks left for him to grow. However, as I stated in my last post, they had us scheduled for a c-section on June 11th...But it looks as if that is going to change based on something they saw today.
Our doctor is very concerned about the amount of fluid on the right side of his brain. They have been monitoring the fluid levels each month, and they have always been within normal range- until now. The amount of fluid has increased significantly since our last visit. There is so much, that they are beginning to worry that the fluid could be putting pressure on Anderson's brain...which would not be a good situation.
Our doctor is going to present the information to her panel of specialists tomorrow, but feels that the decision they will make will be to deliver at 37 weeks rather than waiting until 39. They are going to call me tomorrow to let us know the plan for sure, but were about 98 percent positive that this will be the case.
They also mentioned that once Anderson is born, he will have a scan (ultrasound) of his brain. If the fluid is as bad as they suspect, then he will go to surgery to have a shunt put in. The good news is that Dr. Tulipan would do the surgery and there are people from all over the country who travel to Nashville to have Dr. Tulipan do shunts on their babies because he is supposed to be one of the BEST pediatric neurosurgeons around.
So, a few curve balls appear to have been thrown at us today that we weren't really expecting. We are still in good spirits, our faith is still strong, and we are still hopeful that everything will be okay. We know God is in control, and we ask each of you who read this to please join us in praying. We know God is good- we know He can still heal Anderson and perform a miracle- we also know that even without the miracle, He can give us the strength to make it through this.
After sitting in the waiting room at Vanderbilt and seeing kids who are in pretty bad shape- it puts everything in perspective. We are thankful that things are not worse than what they are...it WILL be okay. Just please pray for our strength and courage, and for the healing of our sweet boy.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Quick update...
Basically no news is good news...things around here have been pretty calm (at least with Anderson and the pregnancy). I just thought I would do a quick update for those of you who have been checking and wondering what's going on.
I started last week having to be seen twice a week- every Monday I go the hospital for a NST (non-stress test), just checking to make sure the baby's heartrate increases with movement and then returns to normal. This shows that he is getting enough oxygen to his brain. He has passed the test both times within the first 5-10 minutes...So things that way look great. I also go see Dr. Kurtz every Thursday for a BPP (biophysical profile). This test checks to see if the baby is practicing "breathing" the amniotic fluid. This is done by watching the diaphragm via ultrasound- pretty neat actually. They also check the blood flow in the umbilical cord. He has done great both times with that also. Neither of these tests have anything to do with the fact that Anderson is missing part of his brain, they actually have to be done because of my blood clotting disorder. Apparently, the farther along I get in pregnancy, the better of a chance there is for a blood clot to form in the umbilical cord and block him from getting the nutrients and oxygen he needs to survive. So, basically this is all precautionary. So far, so good.
We go back to Vandy next Wednesday (5-12) for a full ultrasound to check his size, check all of his organs, and see if that CC has decided to show itself or not. We are not expecting it to be there, as we have become content with it not being there, but I know that my God is big and He can perform miracles even when we aren't expecting them. This will probably be the last "Big" ultrasound before he is born. We have 5 weeks from tomorrow before he is scheduled to arrive! We can't wait. We just want to hold him and love on him.
Dr. Kurtz did take a quick 3D/4D peek at his face last week, just for the fun of it, and it was so sweet! He has fat rolls around his neck and big chubby cheeks! I am so thankful that he is healthy and is growing...anxious to see if he beats his sisters on size. I'm also hoping that the current increase in weight that I am gaining is actually Anderson gaining weight- not me! Ha!
So nothing new is happening. We feel blessed that things are still going well and that he is growing and healthy. Praise God!
On a side note: Many people in our area in Tennessee have been devastated by the recent flooding. There are people who have lost everything they had, businesses that don't know if or when they can reopen, and lives lost. As many of you know, I work in Hickman County and the devastation there is awful...4 days after the rain has ended, there are still people in HC who have not been rescued. They are in areas that are completely cut off from the rest of the community. We don't know when we will be back to school...complete roads have been washed away, sink holes have closed main roads, and many in the county still don't have electricity or water. Please keep everyone who has been affected by this flood in your thoughts and prayers.
I started last week having to be seen twice a week- every Monday I go the hospital for a NST (non-stress test), just checking to make sure the baby's heartrate increases with movement and then returns to normal. This shows that he is getting enough oxygen to his brain. He has passed the test both times within the first 5-10 minutes...So things that way look great. I also go see Dr. Kurtz every Thursday for a BPP (biophysical profile). This test checks to see if the baby is practicing "breathing" the amniotic fluid. This is done by watching the diaphragm via ultrasound- pretty neat actually. They also check the blood flow in the umbilical cord. He has done great both times with that also. Neither of these tests have anything to do with the fact that Anderson is missing part of his brain, they actually have to be done because of my blood clotting disorder. Apparently, the farther along I get in pregnancy, the better of a chance there is for a blood clot to form in the umbilical cord and block him from getting the nutrients and oxygen he needs to survive. So, basically this is all precautionary. So far, so good.
We go back to Vandy next Wednesday (5-12) for a full ultrasound to check his size, check all of his organs, and see if that CC has decided to show itself or not. We are not expecting it to be there, as we have become content with it not being there, but I know that my God is big and He can perform miracles even when we aren't expecting them. This will probably be the last "Big" ultrasound before he is born. We have 5 weeks from tomorrow before he is scheduled to arrive! We can't wait. We just want to hold him and love on him.
Dr. Kurtz did take a quick 3D/4D peek at his face last week, just for the fun of it, and it was so sweet! He has fat rolls around his neck and big chubby cheeks! I am so thankful that he is healthy and is growing...anxious to see if he beats his sisters on size. I'm also hoping that the current increase in weight that I am gaining is actually Anderson gaining weight- not me! Ha!
So nothing new is happening. We feel blessed that things are still going well and that he is growing and healthy. Praise God!
On a side note: Many people in our area in Tennessee have been devastated by the recent flooding. There are people who have lost everything they had, businesses that don't know if or when they can reopen, and lives lost. As many of you know, I work in Hickman County and the devastation there is awful...4 days after the rain has ended, there are still people in HC who have not been rescued. They are in areas that are completely cut off from the rest of the community. We don't know when we will be back to school...complete roads have been washed away, sink holes have closed main roads, and many in the county still don't have electricity or water. Please keep everyone who has been affected by this flood in your thoughts and prayers.
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Not a coincidence
“What a coincidence!” is something I have been known to say a few thousand times throughout my life. However, events that have happened over the past few months during this pregnancy have caused me to change my way of thinking. I no longer believe in “coincidence”. I no longer think people are just lucky or something happened at the right place and right time with no explanation. Nope, that is all in the past.
I have mentioned in previous posts about getting in touch with 2 people who have been able to support me during this time, especially since they both have sons with ACC. I may have even mentioned that one of them lives less than 5 miles from my house…coincidence? No way.
I have also since then been hooked up with a person on Facebook who has a son with ACC, and is helping me get into some networks and get some good information on the subject. Is it a coincidence that we happened to have a mutual friend on Facebook who helped us make the connection? I don’t think so.
But the best happened just today. Let me retell it to you just as it happened…be prepared for some chills. God didn’t just whisper this to me…I think it was more like shouting. (Maybe he didn’t think I caught the first few…he definitely didn’t want me to miss this one!)
I took my class into the cafeteria today, got my lunch, and went to get something to drink. As I was getting my tea, an assistant at our school came up and asked me, “Have you heard about Mrs. M?” (I'm going to keep her name to myself, but all you need to know is that she is a well-known teacher in our school system.) I replied, “No, what about her?”
“Well, just recently she started having some mild seizures. They didn’t know what was causing them so she has had some testing done.” (Honestly, at this point I am thinking "Why is she telling me this?" Not that I wasn’t concerned, I just hadn’t made a connection to why she came rushing to me to tell me this.)
Then she continued… “Well, during the testing, they discovered that she is missing her Corpus Callosum.” (CHILLS yet?)
“You mean, she has never had any symptoms or any problems and she is just now finding out in her 40’s?”
“Exactly. She went through school with no problems, went to college, and is now a teacher, a mother, and a devout Christian. She had no idea that she was missing this piece of her brain, or that anything was missing for that matter.”
I walked out of the cafeteria with chills up and down my spine, thinking “Okay, God. I heard you loud and clear- everything is going to be just fine.”
So, I now know 4 people who are affected with this RARE disorder- and 2 of the 4 either live or work close to me. Coincidence? I don’t think so…
Thank you Lord for placing people in my life to remind me every day that YOU are in control and that YOU will take care of everything.
Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart;”
I have mentioned in previous posts about getting in touch with 2 people who have been able to support me during this time, especially since they both have sons with ACC. I may have even mentioned that one of them lives less than 5 miles from my house…coincidence? No way.
I have also since then been hooked up with a person on Facebook who has a son with ACC, and is helping me get into some networks and get some good information on the subject. Is it a coincidence that we happened to have a mutual friend on Facebook who helped us make the connection? I don’t think so.
But the best happened just today. Let me retell it to you just as it happened…be prepared for some chills. God didn’t just whisper this to me…I think it was more like shouting. (Maybe he didn’t think I caught the first few…he definitely didn’t want me to miss this one!)
I took my class into the cafeteria today, got my lunch, and went to get something to drink. As I was getting my tea, an assistant at our school came up and asked me, “Have you heard about Mrs. M?” (I'm going to keep her name to myself, but all you need to know is that she is a well-known teacher in our school system.) I replied, “No, what about her?”
“Well, just recently she started having some mild seizures. They didn’t know what was causing them so she has had some testing done.” (Honestly, at this point I am thinking "Why is she telling me this?" Not that I wasn’t concerned, I just hadn’t made a connection to why she came rushing to me to tell me this.)
Then she continued… “Well, during the testing, they discovered that she is missing her Corpus Callosum.” (CHILLS yet?)
“You mean, she has never had any symptoms or any problems and she is just now finding out in her 40’s?”
“Exactly. She went through school with no problems, went to college, and is now a teacher, a mother, and a devout Christian. She had no idea that she was missing this piece of her brain, or that anything was missing for that matter.”
I walked out of the cafeteria with chills up and down my spine, thinking “Okay, God. I heard you loud and clear- everything is going to be just fine.”
So, I now know 4 people who are affected with this RARE disorder- and 2 of the 4 either live or work close to me. Coincidence? I don’t think so…
Thank you Lord for placing people in my life to remind me every day that YOU are in control and that YOU will take care of everything.
Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart;”
Thursday, April 15, 2010
The date is set!!
We went back to Vanderbilt yesterday to meet with Dr. Bennett, the maternal fetal specialist, as well as Dr. Tulipan, the pediatric neurosurgeon. For once, we actually left the visit with a big smile on our face and feeling more confident than ever. No miracles have happened, the CC is still not there, but we were still given a good report.
The ultrasound showed no new concerns or problems. Other than showing how much Anderson has grown in a month, everything developmentally looked just like it had at our last visit- The doctors and sonographers seemed puzzled however because it appears that the cavum septum is present- which usually isn't the case when the CC is missing. You either get both or none, from what I understand. But the CC is still unable to be seen on ultrasound or in any of the MRI films (which we got to see yesterday and are AMAZING!)
So, we still know that if God wants that piece of Anderson's brain to be there- it will show up, even though the doctors say it won't. We still believe that God works miracles, but at this time we're okay if we don't get that miracle. After talking to the nerologist, our hope for Anderson's future seemed to be affirmed. My first question for the neuro was "What should be expect when he is born? Will there be lots of doctor's visits, tests, blood work, etc?" His reply was simply this..."I would like to get an MRI of him sometime in the first 3 months or so after he is born, but other than that, you will take him home and love him and treat him like you would any other baby. No special circumstances. You will watch him and if something arises, then we will go from there, but until that happens you just enjoy your new baby like you did with your other 2." I did ask him about Early Intervention, and he said "It won't hurt anything, so if you want to do that, go for it." But his tone indicated that it was not absolutely necessary.
This was very refreshing to hear. I had wondered if we would have lots of doctor's appointments, therapy, etc...that would begin like a whirlwind as soon as he is born. The fact that things will be low key like any other normal pregnancy/delivery is wonderful! Knowing that we can come home from the hospital, rest, rock, and relax is like a dream come true.
We have a little less than 2 months before he makes his arrival because we have already been scheduled for a C-Section on Friday, June 11th. So for those of you who have been praying with us, please continue to pray that things will stay like they are for the next 2 months and that no unforeseen problems should arise. If you still want to pray for the miracle, that's good too! :) I know it is my will that everything miraculously be healed and fine, but when I pray I make sure to tell God that I want HIS will to be done- HE is the one who knows what is best, HE is the one that knows what the future holds, and HE is the one who knows the master plan for Anderson. I don't want my selfish desires to get in the way of HIS plans.
The ultrasound showed no new concerns or problems. Other than showing how much Anderson has grown in a month, everything developmentally looked just like it had at our last visit- The doctors and sonographers seemed puzzled however because it appears that the cavum septum is present- which usually isn't the case when the CC is missing. You either get both or none, from what I understand. But the CC is still unable to be seen on ultrasound or in any of the MRI films (which we got to see yesterday and are AMAZING!)
So, we still know that if God wants that piece of Anderson's brain to be there- it will show up, even though the doctors say it won't. We still believe that God works miracles, but at this time we're okay if we don't get that miracle. After talking to the nerologist, our hope for Anderson's future seemed to be affirmed. My first question for the neuro was "What should be expect when he is born? Will there be lots of doctor's visits, tests, blood work, etc?" His reply was simply this..."I would like to get an MRI of him sometime in the first 3 months or so after he is born, but other than that, you will take him home and love him and treat him like you would any other baby. No special circumstances. You will watch him and if something arises, then we will go from there, but until that happens you just enjoy your new baby like you did with your other 2." I did ask him about Early Intervention, and he said "It won't hurt anything, so if you want to do that, go for it." But his tone indicated that it was not absolutely necessary.
This was very refreshing to hear. I had wondered if we would have lots of doctor's appointments, therapy, etc...that would begin like a whirlwind as soon as he is born. The fact that things will be low key like any other normal pregnancy/delivery is wonderful! Knowing that we can come home from the hospital, rest, rock, and relax is like a dream come true.
We have a little less than 2 months before he makes his arrival because we have already been scheduled for a C-Section on Friday, June 11th. So for those of you who have been praying with us, please continue to pray that things will stay like they are for the next 2 months and that no unforeseen problems should arise. If you still want to pray for the miracle, that's good too! :) I know it is my will that everything miraculously be healed and fine, but when I pray I make sure to tell God that I want HIS will to be done- HE is the one who knows what is best, HE is the one that knows what the future holds, and HE is the one who knows the master plan for Anderson. I don't want my selfish desires to get in the way of HIS plans.
Friday, March 26, 2010
Already blessed
Someone sent me this video and I just had to share it with the rest of you who have been beside us on this journey. With still 12 weeks to go, I feel Anderson has already blessed our family so much...and we haven't even heard him cry. Hope you enjoy!
Monday, March 22, 2010
Second Best sounds pretty good!
We finally got our news today (at 3:30pm) and got a diagnosis. We are very happy with the news...just as we had prepared ourselves for, the corpus callosum is not there- at all. We know that the best news ever would be for everything to have shown up on the MRI that should be there and be told the ultrasounds were wrong. BUT...the second best news is that everything else looks good and appears to be functioning properly- only the corpus callosum is missing.
This is good news, though. The exact diagnosis for all of you medical folks is: isolated agenesis of the corpus callosum. We have been told that Anderson will have mild symptoms, if any. We have also been told that he will surprise us...things that we think he will struggle with he may have no difficulty with at all.
Jamie and I feel like a load has been lifted off our shoulders because now we KNOW. There is no more guessing of whether it's there or not there...no more wondering if there are other things involved or just this. Let me tell you, knowledge is freedom.
I feel like I can now move on and begin preparing for a new baby, just as any expecting mother does. I can enjoy the final 13 weeks (or less) of the pregnancy, without worry. You see, there isn't a lot that can be done now, until he is born. Now that we have the diagnosis, we know a little more of what to expect. We know that we will continue being seen by my regular OB as well as the specialists at Vanderbilt. We know that we will see a pediatric neurologist at our next visit to Vandy to get more information about what to expect when he is born. We know that we will deliver at Vanderbilt and that many pediatric specialists will be available, IF they are needed. We know that once he is born, he will be able to receive therapy from Early Intervention soon after birth to help him meet those milestones. We know that pretty much the rest is up to him...it will be gauged on how well he does.
We know that no matter what, he will be loved and adored by many friends and family. He will be the light in his big sisters' lives, and a blessing to anyone who is around him. We know that with all of the support and love he will have in his life, he is capable of ANYTHING...I can't wait to see what all he is able to accomplish!
Thank you again for your prayers. This diagnosis truly is an answer to prayers...you see, it could have been much, much worse. We are so thankful for this diagnosis. We are relieved and excited about what the future holds for our family. God does answer prayers, and we are humbled by the number of prayers that have gone up daily on behalf of our family and sweet baby.
This is good news, though. The exact diagnosis for all of you medical folks is: isolated agenesis of the corpus callosum. We have been told that Anderson will have mild symptoms, if any. We have also been told that he will surprise us...things that we think he will struggle with he may have no difficulty with at all.
Jamie and I feel like a load has been lifted off our shoulders because now we KNOW. There is no more guessing of whether it's there or not there...no more wondering if there are other things involved or just this. Let me tell you, knowledge is freedom.
I feel like I can now move on and begin preparing for a new baby, just as any expecting mother does. I can enjoy the final 13 weeks (or less) of the pregnancy, without worry. You see, there isn't a lot that can be done now, until he is born. Now that we have the diagnosis, we know a little more of what to expect. We know that we will continue being seen by my regular OB as well as the specialists at Vanderbilt. We know that we will see a pediatric neurologist at our next visit to Vandy to get more information about what to expect when he is born. We know that we will deliver at Vanderbilt and that many pediatric specialists will be available, IF they are needed. We know that once he is born, he will be able to receive therapy from Early Intervention soon after birth to help him meet those milestones. We know that pretty much the rest is up to him...it will be gauged on how well he does.
We know that no matter what, he will be loved and adored by many friends and family. He will be the light in his big sisters' lives, and a blessing to anyone who is around him. We know that with all of the support and love he will have in his life, he is capable of ANYTHING...I can't wait to see what all he is able to accomplish!
Thank you again for your prayers. This diagnosis truly is an answer to prayers...you see, it could have been much, much worse. We are so thankful for this diagnosis. We are relieved and excited about what the future holds for our family. God does answer prayers, and we are humbled by the number of prayers that have gone up daily on behalf of our family and sweet baby.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Not neglected...
So I realized that in keeping everyone posted about Anderson, I haven't posted anything at all about the girls in awhile. I didn't want you to think that they are being totally neglected or put on the back burner (not that any of you would think that). So I thought I'd do a quick post to let you know what they've been up to.
They are absolutely loving life in a subdivision. They have made friends with the kids next door and spent many hours yesterday playing outside with them. This is a big deal, especially for Kinsley, because at the old house they would not play outside unless Jamie or I were right there with them. Yesterday I finally made them come in the house when the street lights started coming on.
Their other new friend is the "Ice Cream Man"... They can hear that music from miles away and will stand on the porch with thier dollars waiting on him. They think he's the coolest thing ever!
Since we live on the end of a cul-de-sac, they are allowed to ride their bikes on the street around the circle while Jamie or I am outside watching them. Kinsley was so excited about having pavement to ride her bike on that I think she rode at least 10 miles on that little bike yesterday. It sure beats having to ride in circles in the garage because we had a gravel driveway! She's hoping to practice without her training wheels soon...that should be a fun adventure.
Karlie loves riding her bike, too. She is getting better at peddling up small hills everyday. She is so funny. She has such a determination about her. She gets really frustrated, but is determined she is going to do it without help.
They are getting really excited about their baby brother and are beginning to ask more frequently how much longer until he gets here. Karlie announced at lunch the other day that "Momma has a BIG belly!" Kinsley gave her a death look and replied, "Karlie, don't say that when Momma is listening! You'll hurt her feelings." It was quite comical...as if I don't realize I have a big belly!
We are looking forward to more days with beautiful weather like we had yesterday. Planning on spending a lot of time outside playing and enjoying the subdivision life.
Jamie and I have tried very hard to protect them from knowing anything could be wrong with the baby. Of course Kinsley was with us at the 20 week ultrasound, but she has never mentioned anything else about it. We haven't talked about it with them. So, other than praying each night for their baby to be healthy, they don't have any reason to think they need to worry. That's the way I would like for it to be until there is a for sure reason that they need to know otherwise.
Have a great day! Thanks for all of the continued prayers. The MRI results did not get put in the computer yesterday for the doctor to give us the results, so we are patiently waiting until Monday to find out some definite answers. Keep praying!
They are absolutely loving life in a subdivision. They have made friends with the kids next door and spent many hours yesterday playing outside with them. This is a big deal, especially for Kinsley, because at the old house they would not play outside unless Jamie or I were right there with them. Yesterday I finally made them come in the house when the street lights started coming on.
Their other new friend is the "Ice Cream Man"... They can hear that music from miles away and will stand on the porch with thier dollars waiting on him. They think he's the coolest thing ever!
Since we live on the end of a cul-de-sac, they are allowed to ride their bikes on the street around the circle while Jamie or I am outside watching them. Kinsley was so excited about having pavement to ride her bike on that I think she rode at least 10 miles on that little bike yesterday. It sure beats having to ride in circles in the garage because we had a gravel driveway! She's hoping to practice without her training wheels soon...that should be a fun adventure.
Karlie loves riding her bike, too. She is getting better at peddling up small hills everyday. She is so funny. She has such a determination about her. She gets really frustrated, but is determined she is going to do it without help.
They are getting really excited about their baby brother and are beginning to ask more frequently how much longer until he gets here. Karlie announced at lunch the other day that "Momma has a BIG belly!" Kinsley gave her a death look and replied, "Karlie, don't say that when Momma is listening! You'll hurt her feelings." It was quite comical...as if I don't realize I have a big belly!
We are looking forward to more days with beautiful weather like we had yesterday. Planning on spending a lot of time outside playing and enjoying the subdivision life.
Jamie and I have tried very hard to protect them from knowing anything could be wrong with the baby. Of course Kinsley was with us at the 20 week ultrasound, but she has never mentioned anything else about it. We haven't talked about it with them. So, other than praying each night for their baby to be healthy, they don't have any reason to think they need to worry. That's the way I would like for it to be until there is a for sure reason that they need to know otherwise.
Have a great day! Thanks for all of the continued prayers. The MRI results did not get put in the computer yesterday for the doctor to give us the results, so we are patiently waiting until Monday to find out some definite answers. Keep praying!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
The Good, The Bad, and The Undecided
It has been an exhausting day both physically and emotionally. Thank you for all the prayers throughout the day today. Please continue to pray. We don't know a lot yet. We have to wait until tomorrow afternoon or Monday for the MRI results, but for now, here's what we know...
The Good:
Anderson is not lacking in growth or nutrition at all! He is following in his sisters' footsteps of being at the top of the growth chart. They are already estimating his weight at 2lb 5 oz....and we still have 3 months to go!
The ultrasound technician thought she could see the cavum septum pellucidum today during the ultrasound. We don't know exactly what this means, but have been told that is supposed to be good news (they could not find it 3 weeks ago).
He was laying in a much better position today for them to get pictures...he is still breech, but not laying facing my back.
The MRI technicians were very pleased with the quality of pictures they were able to get. So, once a radiologist and a neurologist read the films, we should finally get some answers, or at least a solid diagnosis.
The Bad:
During the ultrasound, the sonographer felt like she could see a cyst on his brain. The doctor wouldn't say much about it, she just said to wait and see what the MRI shows.
There was a question about the amount of fluid on the right side of his brain. There wasn't enough for it to be a big concern right now, but they would have to keep an eye on it.
The sonographer also said something to the doctor about "it" being asymmetrical...Jamie and I haven't figured out exactly what is asymmetrical, but we do know that everything in the brain should be symmetrical, so we are hoping the MRI will shed more light on this.
They did tell me today that I will have to deliver at Vanderbilt rather than MRMC. I know that will be a good place for us to be, but I love my OB doctor and was hoping he could deliver this baby also.
The MRI was just as bad as I thought it would be...I hope I don't have to have anymore of those!
The Undecided:
At this point, we really don't know if today was good or bad...when we left the 11:30 ultrasound I was devastated. I felt like more bad things had been revealed to us than any other ultrasound...but the doctor wouldn't say much until she gets the report from the MRI, so I don't know whether to be worried, or if everything is going to be okay. By the time we left the 5:00 MRI, I just felt lost. I felt like I was walking away from an exhausting day with no more information than I had this morning when I walked in.
Anyway, thank you so much for your continued prayers. Please don't stop praying. We are hoping for good news when we get the results from the MRI. We do still know that God is in control and he will take care of everything, but I did have some weak moments today where I allowed Satan to try to convince me that things were NOT going to be okay. The good thing is that when I am weak, Jamie is stronger than ever, and vice versa. He is wonderful to me...after the ultrasound he just kept reminding me that everything will be okay, and that we will get through this TOGETHER, no matter what.
We are both completely exhausted. I only got about 30 minutes of sleep last night. I was so anxious for today and what we would find out, that I just watched the clock tick all night long. I am hoping for a good night's rest tonight. I will post as soon as we get some results- which will hopefully be tomorrow if I can harass enough people at Vanderbilt! :)
For tonight, I will leave you with some of the words of one of my favorite songs that went through my head several times today:
I was sure by now,
God you would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen" and it's still raining.
As the thunder rolls,
I barely hear you whisper through the rain
"I'm with you."
And as your mercy falls,
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
and takes away
I'll praise you in this storm
I will lift my hands
For you are who you are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried,
You hold in your hand,
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm.
~Casting Crowns "Praise You in this Storm"
The Good:
Anderson is not lacking in growth or nutrition at all! He is following in his sisters' footsteps of being at the top of the growth chart. They are already estimating his weight at 2lb 5 oz....and we still have 3 months to go!
The ultrasound technician thought she could see the cavum septum pellucidum today during the ultrasound. We don't know exactly what this means, but have been told that is supposed to be good news (they could not find it 3 weeks ago).
He was laying in a much better position today for them to get pictures...he is still breech, but not laying facing my back.
The MRI technicians were very pleased with the quality of pictures they were able to get. So, once a radiologist and a neurologist read the films, we should finally get some answers, or at least a solid diagnosis.
The Bad:
During the ultrasound, the sonographer felt like she could see a cyst on his brain. The doctor wouldn't say much about it, she just said to wait and see what the MRI shows.
There was a question about the amount of fluid on the right side of his brain. There wasn't enough for it to be a big concern right now, but they would have to keep an eye on it.
The sonographer also said something to the doctor about "it" being asymmetrical...Jamie and I haven't figured out exactly what is asymmetrical, but we do know that everything in the brain should be symmetrical, so we are hoping the MRI will shed more light on this.
They did tell me today that I will have to deliver at Vanderbilt rather than MRMC. I know that will be a good place for us to be, but I love my OB doctor and was hoping he could deliver this baby also.
The MRI was just as bad as I thought it would be...I hope I don't have to have anymore of those!
The Undecided:
At this point, we really don't know if today was good or bad...when we left the 11:30 ultrasound I was devastated. I felt like more bad things had been revealed to us than any other ultrasound...but the doctor wouldn't say much until she gets the report from the MRI, so I don't know whether to be worried, or if everything is going to be okay. By the time we left the 5:00 MRI, I just felt lost. I felt like I was walking away from an exhausting day with no more information than I had this morning when I walked in.
Anyway, thank you so much for your continued prayers. Please don't stop praying. We are hoping for good news when we get the results from the MRI. We do still know that God is in control and he will take care of everything, but I did have some weak moments today where I allowed Satan to try to convince me that things were NOT going to be okay. The good thing is that when I am weak, Jamie is stronger than ever, and vice versa. He is wonderful to me...after the ultrasound he just kept reminding me that everything will be okay, and that we will get through this TOGETHER, no matter what.
We are both completely exhausted. I only got about 30 minutes of sleep last night. I was so anxious for today and what we would find out, that I just watched the clock tick all night long. I am hoping for a good night's rest tonight. I will post as soon as we get some results- which will hopefully be tomorrow if I can harass enough people at Vanderbilt! :)
For tonight, I will leave you with some of the words of one of my favorite songs that went through my head several times today:
I was sure by now,
God you would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen" and it's still raining.
As the thunder rolls,
I barely hear you whisper through the rain
"I'm with you."
And as your mercy falls,
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
and takes away
I'll praise you in this storm
I will lift my hands
For you are who you are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried,
You hold in your hand,
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm.
~Casting Crowns "Praise You in this Storm"
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Jamie's View
I am so excited! Jamie decided he would join me in doing some posts for the blog. The following is his perspective on the pregnancy, the initial ultrasound, and what the future holds.
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Let me first say "Thank you" to everyone who has offered up prayers on our behalf and said many kind, thoughtful, and encouraging words during the last few months. I cannot tell you how much both have meant to our family. It is truly a blessing to have such wonderful friends!
It was the day we had all looked forward to. One that seemed like it would never arrive. It was the day we would finally find out the sex of our third child. We were all so excited. Kinsley even got to skip school to go with us to find out the big surprise.
After having two healthy, beautiful, adorable girls, it was my wish, as it is for most fathers, to have a boy. A son I could call my own. One who would hopefully want to be and do everything his father was and did.
After arriving, we were placed in an ultrasound room with the sonographer. She was polite, profressional, and explained the entire process. Everything was going exactly how I had envisioned. This was great!
You could tell that she had a process by which she examined every fetus. A process which would not reveal the sex of the baby at first. This was one of the main reasons I came to the ultrasound. I wanted to know what we were having. I had been through two of these before. Just tell me whether I am having a boy or a girl!
Shortly into the examination, we began hearing words like beautiful, amazing, perfect, etc...These are the words every parent dreams of hearing. Words that convey that everything was in place and working. I was on top of the world.
She then revealed that we were having a BOY! My eyes filled with tears. I was overcome with joy. My wish had come true!
Soon after this announcement, her tone of voice changed. You could see it in her eyes. She became serious, reserved, and focused, as if something was wrong. We were told this is the last thing she looks for. She continued to look. By this time, I was scared. I mean, really scared. I was sick. My stomach was in my throat. What could be wrong? Don't tell me this one thing that I had longed for wasn't perfect. Don't tell me that he won't be able to walk, talk, or do anything for himself.
Until this time, everything seemed okay. All necessary parts were in place and working. I thought we were having a beautiful and perfect baby. It was then that we were placed in a room to wait and talk to the doctor. We waited for over an hour waiting to talk with the doctor. This seemed like an eternity!
When the doctor arrived, she discussed the problem. She gave us a brief description of the CC and it's role in the brain, as well as any effects that Anderson may experience if it did not develop by the next ultrasound.
As you are aware from Andrea's previous posts, the CC is still not there. All other factors seem to be in place, normal size, and functioning. For this I am thankful.
I have come to realize that Anderson may not be perfect in the way I USED to think of as perfect. He will be his own person and I am convinced he will teach me many special things about life I have never thought about. He will be loved and spoiled. Most of all, I will be thankful to God for giving me a son of my very own!
Thank you again for the phone calls, kind words, and prayers. I humbly ask for your continued prayers in the upcoming months as we prepare for the arrival of Anderson. May God richly bless you and your family.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Welcome to Holland
As Jamie and I prepare ourselves for our doctor's visit this Thursday, we feel blessed beyond measure. The number of people who are praying for our sweet Anderson is overwhelming. God has also placed two other new people in our lives this past week who have been a blessing to us. It can't be a coincidence that I have met, and gotten to talk to, two other mothers of children with ACC (Agenesis of the Corpus Callosum)- one right here in my hometown, and another several hundred miles away in Arizona. What a blessing!
Tonight, I know that Thursday's appointments will be stressful, I know that I am scared out of my mind to have the MRI, and I am nervous of exactly what we will find out. But, God is still giving me a sense of peace. I feel that I am prepared to handle the news that the CC is not there at all, even on the MRI. Especially after talking to one of my new friends on the phone, I know that this news will not be the end of the world. Will it be different than what we planned? Yes, but that doesn't mean it's bad... I am also prepared to have a huge celebration if we were to happen to find out that the CC is there and everything looks wonderful. Although I have not allowed myself to get my hopes up this time. I am prepared for either outcome.
One of the things that I discussed with one of my new friends who knows what I'm going through because she has "been there, done that", was the fact that people who have never been through something like this don't understand, they don't know what to say, so often times, they don't say anything. It's funny to watch people's reactions when they come up to me and ask how I am feeling/doing. When I reply..."I am great! I couldn't be better! I have no complaints." they look at me like I'm crazy. But, I am okay. I feel great. And I know and trust that God is in control. He has given me a peace like I never thought I would have with something like this.
But I wanted to share a poem with you. This poem was written by a mother of a special needs child, who puts into words what it is like to have a special needs child...She does a very beautiful job of putting into words what it's like from the moment you are pregnant and find out your child has something wrong.
While I haven't experienced all of the areas of the poem because I am still in the planning stages of my "trip", this poem gives me hope. It gives me a new perspective of looking at life. It's a little long, but it is WONDERFUL so please read the entire thing. Maybe you, too, will be blessed by her words.
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Welcome to Holland
By: Emily Perl Kingsley
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability-to try to help people who have not shared the unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel.
It's like this: When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip- to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans: the Coliseum, Michaelangelo's "David", the gondolas in Venice...You may learn some handy phrases in Itailian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the big day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands.
The flight attendant comes and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?" you say. "What do you mean, Holland? I signed up for Italy. All my life I have dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plans. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. You must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they are all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, "Yes, that is where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never ever, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
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Thank you, Lord for allowing me my trips to Italy twice already. Please help me to plan for a wonderful trip to Holland this time, if that is your will.
Tonight, I know that Thursday's appointments will be stressful, I know that I am scared out of my mind to have the MRI, and I am nervous of exactly what we will find out. But, God is still giving me a sense of peace. I feel that I am prepared to handle the news that the CC is not there at all, even on the MRI. Especially after talking to one of my new friends on the phone, I know that this news will not be the end of the world. Will it be different than what we planned? Yes, but that doesn't mean it's bad... I am also prepared to have a huge celebration if we were to happen to find out that the CC is there and everything looks wonderful. Although I have not allowed myself to get my hopes up this time. I am prepared for either outcome.
One of the things that I discussed with one of my new friends who knows what I'm going through because she has "been there, done that", was the fact that people who have never been through something like this don't understand, they don't know what to say, so often times, they don't say anything. It's funny to watch people's reactions when they come up to me and ask how I am feeling/doing. When I reply..."I am great! I couldn't be better! I have no complaints." they look at me like I'm crazy. But, I am okay. I feel great. And I know and trust that God is in control. He has given me a peace like I never thought I would have with something like this.
But I wanted to share a poem with you. This poem was written by a mother of a special needs child, who puts into words what it is like to have a special needs child...She does a very beautiful job of putting into words what it's like from the moment you are pregnant and find out your child has something wrong.
While I haven't experienced all of the areas of the poem because I am still in the planning stages of my "trip", this poem gives me hope. It gives me a new perspective of looking at life. It's a little long, but it is WONDERFUL so please read the entire thing. Maybe you, too, will be blessed by her words.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Welcome to Holland
By: Emily Perl Kingsley
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability-to try to help people who have not shared the unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel.
It's like this: When you are going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip- to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans: the Coliseum, Michaelangelo's "David", the gondolas in Venice...You may learn some handy phrases in Itailian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the big day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands.
The flight attendant comes and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?" you say. "What do you mean, Holland? I signed up for Italy. All my life I have dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plans. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guidebooks. You must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there awhile and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they are all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, "Yes, that is where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned." And the pain of that will never ever, ever go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
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Thank you, Lord for allowing me my trips to Italy twice already. Please help me to plan for a wonderful trip to Holland this time, if that is your will.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Latest News...
The past month has FLOWN by so quickly! It seems like just a week or so ago since I last updated the blog, but now I realize that it has been exactly a month. What a busy month it has been!
We did sell our house and have moved into our new home. We still have a few things that we have NO idea where they are, but overall things are unpacked and we are loving our new space. Due to the move, we have been without internet service for well over a week. I haven't been able to post to the blog or check many facebook statuses, besides the few minutes of wireless we "borrow" from a neighbor. (hey, if you don't put a password on your wireless, then you are technically allowing me to borrow! Oops!) I figured there were some of you who had been checking the blog for an update on the baby since our visit to Vanderbilt on the 24th of February.
The 24th was the day that we (along with many of you) had been praying for a miracle. We didn't get our miracle that day, but we did get some encouraging news. The corpus callosum was still not visible via ultrasound. This was hard for me to hear, because I had convinced myself that it WOULD be there this time. However, after getting over the initial disappointment, I allowed myself to hear the positive news among all of it.
At this time, everything else in the baby's brain (or body for that matter) appear normal: normal size, normal shape, normal placement, etc. The only problem is the missing corpus callosum. This news is good because it pushes us toward the less severe end of the symptoms spectrum. In fact, the doctors at Vandy told us there are adults walking around today missing this piece of their brain and they don't even know it- sometimes adults go for a CT scan for some other reason and discover during the test that they are missing this piece of their brain...weird, huh?
We are scheduled to have a fetal MRI on March 18th. The MRI should show the area of the brain in much more detail than the ultrasound is able to do. We will receive a diagnosis after the results of the MRI are shared with our specialist. They did explain to us that there will still be many questions that they cannot answer, even after giving the diagnosis.
As I mentioned earlier, I was very disappointed at first during our last appointment. However, I have since realized that it's okay. This time I am preparing myself for the MRI to also confirm that this area of the brain is still missing. I am preparing myself for a diagnosis, as well as any challenges we may face with this sweet baby boy. This does NOT mean that I don't still pray every day for a miracle. It does NOT mean that I have given up on God or think that he isn't going to do anything about it. In fact, quite the opposite. I believe all things happen for a reason. I know that God has the power to heal this baby, but if he chooses not to do a complete healing, there is a purpose. Either he has big plans for this child, our family, or some other way that this situation will be used for his glory. I don't know the reason, but I do know that God is in control and he will take care of us- NO MATTER WHAT.
Can I admit something? There are days that I really feel guilty about asking people to pray for the baby. Sound crazy? I know. But instead of asking myself "Why me? Why my baby?" I've started asking "Why not me?" Do I think I am too good to have a child with special needs? So, thank you for your prayers...but sometimes I feel guilt about asking for them. I know prayer is a very powerful thing, but this guilt is something I am currently struggling with.
We don't know what the future holds for this child, but right now the doctors are leading us in a more positive direction. This good news must be answers to prayers going up on behalf of this baby and our family. Praise God! We do believe in the power of prayer, but I am also realistic and understand that things don't have to be PERFECT to be OKAY. And I think I can live with that.
By the way, this sweet baby does finally have a name:
Anderson Knox Spears
We did sell our house and have moved into our new home. We still have a few things that we have NO idea where they are, but overall things are unpacked and we are loving our new space. Due to the move, we have been without internet service for well over a week. I haven't been able to post to the blog or check many facebook statuses, besides the few minutes of wireless we "borrow" from a neighbor. (hey, if you don't put a password on your wireless, then you are technically allowing me to borrow! Oops!) I figured there were some of you who had been checking the blog for an update on the baby since our visit to Vanderbilt on the 24th of February.
The 24th was the day that we (along with many of you) had been praying for a miracle. We didn't get our miracle that day, but we did get some encouraging news. The corpus callosum was still not visible via ultrasound. This was hard for me to hear, because I had convinced myself that it WOULD be there this time. However, after getting over the initial disappointment, I allowed myself to hear the positive news among all of it.
At this time, everything else in the baby's brain (or body for that matter) appear normal: normal size, normal shape, normal placement, etc. The only problem is the missing corpus callosum. This news is good because it pushes us toward the less severe end of the symptoms spectrum. In fact, the doctors at Vandy told us there are adults walking around today missing this piece of their brain and they don't even know it- sometimes adults go for a CT scan for some other reason and discover during the test that they are missing this piece of their brain...weird, huh?
We are scheduled to have a fetal MRI on March 18th. The MRI should show the area of the brain in much more detail than the ultrasound is able to do. We will receive a diagnosis after the results of the MRI are shared with our specialist. They did explain to us that there will still be many questions that they cannot answer, even after giving the diagnosis.
As I mentioned earlier, I was very disappointed at first during our last appointment. However, I have since realized that it's okay. This time I am preparing myself for the MRI to also confirm that this area of the brain is still missing. I am preparing myself for a diagnosis, as well as any challenges we may face with this sweet baby boy. This does NOT mean that I don't still pray every day for a miracle. It does NOT mean that I have given up on God or think that he isn't going to do anything about it. In fact, quite the opposite. I believe all things happen for a reason. I know that God has the power to heal this baby, but if he chooses not to do a complete healing, there is a purpose. Either he has big plans for this child, our family, or some other way that this situation will be used for his glory. I don't know the reason, but I do know that God is in control and he will take care of us- NO MATTER WHAT.
Can I admit something? There are days that I really feel guilty about asking people to pray for the baby. Sound crazy? I know. But instead of asking myself "Why me? Why my baby?" I've started asking "Why not me?" Do I think I am too good to have a child with special needs? So, thank you for your prayers...but sometimes I feel guilt about asking for them. I know prayer is a very powerful thing, but this guilt is something I am currently struggling with.
We don't know what the future holds for this child, but right now the doctors are leading us in a more positive direction. This good news must be answers to prayers going up on behalf of this baby and our family. Praise God! We do believe in the power of prayer, but I am also realistic and understand that things don't have to be PERFECT to be OKAY. And I think I can live with that.
By the way, this sweet baby does finally have a name:
Anderson Knox Spears
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Where we are...
For those of you who keep checking in on the blog to see what's going on, I thought I'd post a quick little update.
1st- My regular OB/GYN thought a 2nd opinion was a good idea, so he has scheduled me an appointment with a Maternal Fetal Doctor at Vanderbilt. Of course the earliest they can see us is Feb. 24th. We will see the doctor AND have another ultrasound done that day.
2nd- Jamie and I have spent lots of time researching all there is to know about a missing corpus callosum and the disorders that can go along with it. Our research has been really beneficially to us because we now have a list of questions to ask at the next ultrasound. We feel we know what information to find out to give us a better idea of what to expect. That was the entire purpose for our research.
3rd- Since there really isn't anything that we can DO, or any more answers that we can get until we have another ultrasound, we have decided to stay off the internet in regards to this, and just spend our time praying for a miracle on the 24th.
I am not going to pretend that I haven't had my moments of fear and doubt...I have. But at the moment, I am at peace with all of this. I know that between now and the 24th, I have to hand all of this over to God...I cannot ignore my girls, just so I can spend all day worrying and searching for more information. I have to get on with my daily life. So, other than constant prayer for healing...I am moving on. I ask any of you who read this blog to also pray that when we go to Vanderbilt on the 24th of February, that everything will be just as it should be.
Another update...we have FINALLY sold our house. We are going to buy the house my parents lived in while I was in college. We are supposed to close on both houses Feb. 18th. So, I really need to get busy packing. I think February is going to be a busy month!
Thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement. I have received many emails, facebook comments, and comments on here that are very very encouraging. Thank you! You have no idea how much all of those comments mean to us.
1st- My regular OB/GYN thought a 2nd opinion was a good idea, so he has scheduled me an appointment with a Maternal Fetal Doctor at Vanderbilt. Of course the earliest they can see us is Feb. 24th. We will see the doctor AND have another ultrasound done that day.
2nd- Jamie and I have spent lots of time researching all there is to know about a missing corpus callosum and the disorders that can go along with it. Our research has been really beneficially to us because we now have a list of questions to ask at the next ultrasound. We feel we know what information to find out to give us a better idea of what to expect. That was the entire purpose for our research.
3rd- Since there really isn't anything that we can DO, or any more answers that we can get until we have another ultrasound, we have decided to stay off the internet in regards to this, and just spend our time praying for a miracle on the 24th.
I am not going to pretend that I haven't had my moments of fear and doubt...I have. But at the moment, I am at peace with all of this. I know that between now and the 24th, I have to hand all of this over to God...I cannot ignore my girls, just so I can spend all day worrying and searching for more information. I have to get on with my daily life. So, other than constant prayer for healing...I am moving on. I ask any of you who read this blog to also pray that when we go to Vanderbilt on the 24th of February, that everything will be just as it should be.
Another update...we have FINALLY sold our house. We are going to buy the house my parents lived in while I was in college. We are supposed to close on both houses Feb. 18th. So, I really need to get busy packing. I think February is going to be a busy month!
Thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement. I have received many emails, facebook comments, and comments on here that are very very encouraging. Thank you! You have no idea how much all of those comments mean to us.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Frustrated
When it comes to medical diagnoses, have you ever felt like you've been lied to? Maybe lied isn't the right word....misled may be a more accurate description. This is exactly how I feel today.
Many friends and family had told me not to go online and look up information on the absence of the corpus callosum (aka. Agenesis of the Corpus Callosum). They said it would just make me scared and worry more. However, I want you to show me one mother out there, who wouldn't want to be educated and feel prepared for any birth defect that her child might have. I feel like with the more information I can have regarding this defect, then I will know what questions to ask and what to expect throughout the remainder of the pregnancy. The way I see it, I can either hide from the information that is out there and live in the wonderful world of the unknown, or I can educate myself completely on this and be prepared with all of the necessary tools/doctors/therapies that are available.
So, today I decided to take a look online. I found case studies, medical journals, medical research, support sites, etc. The more I found, the angrier I became. As I look back, I feel that the doctor who gave us the diagnosis and explained it to us, gave us a very watered-dow version. And when I asked the specific question of how this would affect the baby mentally, I was given the answer "not at all." From what I have read today, this is a complete distruth.
Don't get me wrong...my faith in the outcome of this baby has not changed. I still have complete faith that God is in control. But, I don't think God expects us to sit back, doing nothing. Even though he is in control of the situation, I still feel I have responsibilities as well. Just because you are pregnant and know God will take care of the baby, doesn't mean you don't still have to take prenatal vitamins and take care of yourself, right? So I feel that it is my responsibility to know as much as I can and get the right treatment both prenatally, and postnatally.
So, after my readings today, I am frustrated. I want to know why the other tests that are available to help diagnose this problem haven't been ordered. I want to know why the doctor didn't give us a realistic view of what life for this baby could be like. If the affects from this defect have a large spectrum of symptoms, I want to know whether other areas of the brain have already been affected or not....I have so many questions.
Jamie and I so much appreciate all of the wonderful support we have been receiving from friends and family. Prayers are still very much appreciated because miracles DO happen. Please bear with me as I struggle between being "okay and accepting" of the diagnosis to being "frustrated and confused."
For now, I will continue praying and trusting in the Lord to know and be in charge of what is going to come, with the baby, with our family, with our future.
Many friends and family had told me not to go online and look up information on the absence of the corpus callosum (aka. Agenesis of the Corpus Callosum). They said it would just make me scared and worry more. However, I want you to show me one mother out there, who wouldn't want to be educated and feel prepared for any birth defect that her child might have. I feel like with the more information I can have regarding this defect, then I will know what questions to ask and what to expect throughout the remainder of the pregnancy. The way I see it, I can either hide from the information that is out there and live in the wonderful world of the unknown, or I can educate myself completely on this and be prepared with all of the necessary tools/doctors/therapies that are available.
So, today I decided to take a look online. I found case studies, medical journals, medical research, support sites, etc. The more I found, the angrier I became. As I look back, I feel that the doctor who gave us the diagnosis and explained it to us, gave us a very watered-dow version. And when I asked the specific question of how this would affect the baby mentally, I was given the answer "not at all." From what I have read today, this is a complete distruth.
Don't get me wrong...my faith in the outcome of this baby has not changed. I still have complete faith that God is in control. But, I don't think God expects us to sit back, doing nothing. Even though he is in control of the situation, I still feel I have responsibilities as well. Just because you are pregnant and know God will take care of the baby, doesn't mean you don't still have to take prenatal vitamins and take care of yourself, right? So I feel that it is my responsibility to know as much as I can and get the right treatment both prenatally, and postnatally.
So, after my readings today, I am frustrated. I want to know why the other tests that are available to help diagnose this problem haven't been ordered. I want to know why the doctor didn't give us a realistic view of what life for this baby could be like. If the affects from this defect have a large spectrum of symptoms, I want to know whether other areas of the brain have already been affected or not....I have so many questions.
Jamie and I so much appreciate all of the wonderful support we have been receiving from friends and family. Prayers are still very much appreciated because miracles DO happen. Please bear with me as I struggle between being "okay and accepting" of the diagnosis to being "frustrated and confused."
For now, I will continue praying and trusting in the Lord to know and be in charge of what is going to come, with the baby, with our family, with our future.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Taking things for granted
During every pregnancy, an ultrasound is done around 20 weeks. To most parents, this ultrasound is the time when you find out if it's a boy or girl. To the doctors and ultrasound technicians, this visit is much more than simply to determine the sex of the baby. The are checking for many things...a heart with all four valves working properly, kidneys with fluid in them, a bladder, a stomach, all of the bones in the arms and legs, the nasal bone, and believe it or not, they even check for all 3 bones to be present in the pinky finger. There are many other detailed things that they check for, including something I've never heard of until today...the Corpus Callosum.
We had our ultrasound today. For the first 45 minutes of the ultrasound, everything was wonderful. We were truly floating on cloud 9. We found out we are having a boy- Jamie nearly leapt out of his chair he was so excited. The sweet lady who did our ultrasound kept commenting on how wonderful everything looked. "Oh, what a sweet baby." "Would you look at that heart? That looks absolutely wonderful." She went back and forth between talking to us and actually talking to the baby as she performed the ultrasound. She explained everything to us as she looked. She commented what wonderful pictures she was able to get and how she could sit and ultrasound me all day because it was so easy to get a good picture. After getting several good profile shots and oohing and ahhing over how precious the baby was, she told us she had one more thing to check and then she would be finished.
The next area that she began to check was the baby's head. I knew she was checking out the brain, but had no idea what all she was looking for. However, Jamie and I both realized very quickly that what she saw (or didn't see) wasn't what she was hoping for. Her demeanor quickly changed from love and excitement to seriousness and concern.
She did manage to smile as she told us she was "having trouble finding something" and would like to get another ultrasound tech to come in and take a look if we don't mind. She comes back a few minutes later and the other lady went straight to work. She, too, couldn't find whatever it was they were looking for, and tells the other tech to show the pictures to the doctor and let her come in and look to see if she can find it. They both leave the room.
"What are they looking for?" Jamie and I ask each other this question almost at the same time.
This time when the ultrasound tech comes in, she tells us that the doctor looked at the pictures and she doesn't need to come in and look for herself- it's not there.
I ask her "What exactly is it that you are looking for?" It was at this moment that we were introduced to the term corpus callosum. She explained to us that this is a part of the brain that allows the left hemisphere and the right hemisphere to communicate with each other. We both sat there with blank stares as she said. "As far as how this will affect the baby, I can't tell you because I am not a doctor. We are going to put you in a room and the doctor will come explain more to you about it."
So then we were placed in a small holding room for an hour waiting on the doctor and fearing the worst.
Jamie, Kinsley, and I all sat in that room crying and praying and just hoping that this would not be as bad as it sounded. While we were waiting, we contacted some of our closest family and friends and asked them to start praying. And what wonderful friends and family we have because they immediately began praying!! That is so powerful!
When the doctor finally came in to talk to us, she gave us more information about what to expect and eased our fears- some of the prayers had already been answered- it WASN"T as bad as what it sounded like or what we were imagining during that hour wait. Here are the basic facts:
- the corpus callosum does, in fact, allow the left and right side of the brain to communicate
- missing this area of the brain does not put the baby at risk of dying
- mentally, the baby should not be affected by this
- the two main side effects that have been linked to missing this area are seizures and coordination problems.
- some people never experience any symptoms
- there is still some hope that this area could develop between now and June.
I haven't allowed myself to get on the internet and look this up. For now I am content knowing that overall the baby is healthy, that it doesn't have a life-threatening disorder, and that I can trust God and know he is in control.
I am going to do my best to enjoy the remainder of the pregnancy, continue praying for the health and well-being of myself and the baby, and look forward to having a precious little boy to sit and rock this summer.
Thank you for all of the prayers that were sent up on our behalf today. Please don't stop praying. Our family truly believes in the power of prayer and we know that God can heal the baby if that is his will. We also know that if the baby is born without complete healing, God will give us the strength and courage to deal with any symptoms or problems that arise.
We had our ultrasound today. For the first 45 minutes of the ultrasound, everything was wonderful. We were truly floating on cloud 9. We found out we are having a boy- Jamie nearly leapt out of his chair he was so excited. The sweet lady who did our ultrasound kept commenting on how wonderful everything looked. "Oh, what a sweet baby." "Would you look at that heart? That looks absolutely wonderful." She went back and forth between talking to us and actually talking to the baby as she performed the ultrasound. She explained everything to us as she looked. She commented what wonderful pictures she was able to get and how she could sit and ultrasound me all day because it was so easy to get a good picture. After getting several good profile shots and oohing and ahhing over how precious the baby was, she told us she had one more thing to check and then she would be finished.
The next area that she began to check was the baby's head. I knew she was checking out the brain, but had no idea what all she was looking for. However, Jamie and I both realized very quickly that what she saw (or didn't see) wasn't what she was hoping for. Her demeanor quickly changed from love and excitement to seriousness and concern.
She did manage to smile as she told us she was "having trouble finding something" and would like to get another ultrasound tech to come in and take a look if we don't mind. She comes back a few minutes later and the other lady went straight to work. She, too, couldn't find whatever it was they were looking for, and tells the other tech to show the pictures to the doctor and let her come in and look to see if she can find it. They both leave the room.
"What are they looking for?" Jamie and I ask each other this question almost at the same time.
This time when the ultrasound tech comes in, she tells us that the doctor looked at the pictures and she doesn't need to come in and look for herself- it's not there.
I ask her "What exactly is it that you are looking for?" It was at this moment that we were introduced to the term corpus callosum. She explained to us that this is a part of the brain that allows the left hemisphere and the right hemisphere to communicate with each other. We both sat there with blank stares as she said. "As far as how this will affect the baby, I can't tell you because I am not a doctor. We are going to put you in a room and the doctor will come explain more to you about it."
So then we were placed in a small holding room for an hour waiting on the doctor and fearing the worst.
Jamie, Kinsley, and I all sat in that room crying and praying and just hoping that this would not be as bad as it sounded. While we were waiting, we contacted some of our closest family and friends and asked them to start praying. And what wonderful friends and family we have because they immediately began praying!! That is so powerful!
When the doctor finally came in to talk to us, she gave us more information about what to expect and eased our fears- some of the prayers had already been answered- it WASN"T as bad as what it sounded like or what we were imagining during that hour wait. Here are the basic facts:
- the corpus callosum does, in fact, allow the left and right side of the brain to communicate
- missing this area of the brain does not put the baby at risk of dying
- mentally, the baby should not be affected by this
- the two main side effects that have been linked to missing this area are seizures and coordination problems.
- some people never experience any symptoms
- there is still some hope that this area could develop between now and June.
I haven't allowed myself to get on the internet and look this up. For now I am content knowing that overall the baby is healthy, that it doesn't have a life-threatening disorder, and that I can trust God and know he is in control.
I am going to do my best to enjoy the remainder of the pregnancy, continue praying for the health and well-being of myself and the baby, and look forward to having a precious little boy to sit and rock this summer.
Thank you for all of the prayers that were sent up on our behalf today. Please don't stop praying. Our family truly believes in the power of prayer and we know that God can heal the baby if that is his will. We also know that if the baby is born without complete healing, God will give us the strength and courage to deal with any symptoms or problems that arise.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Two Firsts....
It wasn't much....
In fact it was less than 1/2 inch.....
But it didn't matter...any snow around here causes lots of excitement! This is our first snow of 2010.
Another first
Remember how Jamie has taken up the new pasttime of hunting? Well, he scored his first deer the other day. Here is the proof:
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Looking Back on 2009
2009...How will it be remembered? What will our family remember most? Will it be the first African American President? The tough economy where many lost their jobs? The death and sickness of some close acquaintances? New friends? Challenges that nearly tore our family apart?
What is it that we will remember about 2009 when we look backwards in a few years? It's really hard to pick just one thing...this past year has been one of sadness, happiness, stress, relaxation, challenges, successess, unknowns, and new discoveries- all in one.
It has definitely been a long journey through 2009. To be completely honest, the past year began with some events that put our family at rock bottom...some events that challenged us as a family to take a good close look at what was important to us in life. Going through these challenges was not fun or enjoyable...but I have to say that after surviving and coming out on the other side, I could not be more thankful to have gone through it. Coming out of those events, our family is stronger, our marriage is closer, we are more content with the things we have, and are definitely a more spiritual family who believes in the power of God. We have seen him answer prayers; we have felt his forgiveness and mercy; and we have felt him carry us through times when we knew we couldn't make it on our own.
As we overcame those obstacles, many new and exciting things began happening to our family including a new job for me, and a job transfer for Jamie which put him closer to home. Both of these were blessings for our family.
We have experienced some wonderful family vacations...one in July with my family, and another in October with just the four of us. That time spent together is something so special to us. It doesn't matter where we are or what we're doing, just being together and enjoying the girls as they grow so quickly, is worth every penny spent on vacation.
We learned in October that we will be welcoming a new member to our family in June...the girls are so excited about having a new brother or sister. We will find out in January so stay tuned to find out... This has brought some other changes, including the fact we now need a bigger house, as we have outgrown our current one. It is on the market, but the economy is not helping it sell. We will have to purchase a new vehicle soon, as a car seat does not fit between Kinsley and Karlie in the backseat of our current vehicle. Oh well...it will all be worth it when we bring home our precious new addition to the family.
As far as our extended families go, we have had some moments this past year that have caused us to pull even closer to these extended families and to be thankful for having them in our lives. These relationships are very important to us, and we are truly thankful that our girls have so many people who love and care about them...what more can you ask for?
Don't get me wrong, things are not always rosey and wonderful in our lives...if I had to sum up 2009 I could do it with this quote,
"It began with us being thrown some big lemons, and it ended with us sitting back sipping on some wonderful lemonade looking toward 2010 and wondering what will come...whatever it may be."
Happy New Year to all of you. I hope 2010 will bring blessings and hope to you and your families.
What is it that we will remember about 2009 when we look backwards in a few years? It's really hard to pick just one thing...this past year has been one of sadness, happiness, stress, relaxation, challenges, successess, unknowns, and new discoveries- all in one.
It has definitely been a long journey through 2009. To be completely honest, the past year began with some events that put our family at rock bottom...some events that challenged us as a family to take a good close look at what was important to us in life. Going through these challenges was not fun or enjoyable...but I have to say that after surviving and coming out on the other side, I could not be more thankful to have gone through it. Coming out of those events, our family is stronger, our marriage is closer, we are more content with the things we have, and are definitely a more spiritual family who believes in the power of God. We have seen him answer prayers; we have felt his forgiveness and mercy; and we have felt him carry us through times when we knew we couldn't make it on our own.
As we overcame those obstacles, many new and exciting things began happening to our family including a new job for me, and a job transfer for Jamie which put him closer to home. Both of these were blessings for our family.
We have experienced some wonderful family vacations...one in July with my family, and another in October with just the four of us. That time spent together is something so special to us. It doesn't matter where we are or what we're doing, just being together and enjoying the girls as they grow so quickly, is worth every penny spent on vacation.
We learned in October that we will be welcoming a new member to our family in June...the girls are so excited about having a new brother or sister. We will find out in January so stay tuned to find out... This has brought some other changes, including the fact we now need a bigger house, as we have outgrown our current one. It is on the market, but the economy is not helping it sell. We will have to purchase a new vehicle soon, as a car seat does not fit between Kinsley and Karlie in the backseat of our current vehicle. Oh well...it will all be worth it when we bring home our precious new addition to the family.
As far as our extended families go, we have had some moments this past year that have caused us to pull even closer to these extended families and to be thankful for having them in our lives. These relationships are very important to us, and we are truly thankful that our girls have so many people who love and care about them...what more can you ask for?
Don't get me wrong, things are not always rosey and wonderful in our lives...if I had to sum up 2009 I could do it with this quote,
"It began with us being thrown some big lemons, and it ended with us sitting back sipping on some wonderful lemonade looking toward 2010 and wondering what will come...whatever it may be."
Happy New Year to all of you. I hope 2010 will bring blessings and hope to you and your families.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Shhh...It's a secret
I love the honesty of 3 year olds.
Tonight as I was blow drying Karlie's hair before she went to bed, she kept turning and looking at me like she wanted to tell me something. I just thought she wouldn't tell me because she thought I wouldn't be able to hear her over the blow dryer, so I leaned really close to her and asked "What did you want to tell me?"
"I didn't say nuffin." she said...then she keeps looking at me with that look of "I really want to tell you something."
So I said to her again, "What is it? What did you want to tell me?"
Her reply, "I'm not going to tell you. Daddy helped me write my name in your birthday card, but daddy said I am not supposed to tell you about the card. So I can't tell you."
I just smiled, chuckled under my breath, and told her "If daddy said not to tell then make sure you don't tell."
She seemed content with that. She smiled, nodded her head, and said, "Okay, I won't tell."
Tonight as I was blow drying Karlie's hair before she went to bed, she kept turning and looking at me like she wanted to tell me something. I just thought she wouldn't tell me because she thought I wouldn't be able to hear her over the blow dryer, so I leaned really close to her and asked "What did you want to tell me?"
"I didn't say nuffin." she said...then she keeps looking at me with that look of "I really want to tell you something."
So I said to her again, "What is it? What did you want to tell me?"
Her reply, "I'm not going to tell you. Daddy helped me write my name in your birthday card, but daddy said I am not supposed to tell you about the card. So I can't tell you."
I just smiled, chuckled under my breath, and told her "If daddy said not to tell then make sure you don't tell."
She seemed content with that. She smiled, nodded her head, and said, "Okay, I won't tell."
Monday, December 7, 2009
Thankful...
Have you ever let little things get you completely stressed out? You know, things that don't amount to a hill of beans...yet affect us like it's the end of the world? Do you really take time at Thanksgiving to STOP and be thankful for all of your blessings, your family, your health, etc...or are you too busy worrying about getting all the food cooked and on a nicely decorated table, too busy checking the sale ads for Black Friday, or being totally consumed by football, that you completely overlook the fact that the purpose of the holiday is to stop and be thankful for your bountiful blessings? (You realize that by saying "you" I am really meaning "me".)
Well, tonight I had a moment that hit me square in the face. It hit me hard. And it made me realize that I take everything I have for granted. I am not near as thankful as I should be, and I treat little petty things like major events. Guess I needed a reality check and that is exactly what I got.
You see, a family at our church is pleading for prayers for their sister. She is in ICU and very ill. She isn't much older than me, and she has young children at home like me. I have been praying several times a day for her, as well as checking her caringbridge site for updates at least 5-6 times a day. It has been devastating to this familiy, but their faith is strong and many people are crying out to God on her behalf. How thankful I should be every day for my health and the health of my family! However, I don't. I don't stop near enough and truly thank God for these blessings.
Tonight on the caringbridge update, the family asked us to continue to pray for their family member, but to also pray for a 3 year old little girl with cancer. At the end of the post they put a link to the young girl's caringbridge site.
As I sat and read the updates, looked at the pictures of the beautiful child, and read the comments that people are leaving for the family, I felt completely guilty. I sat and cried my eyes out. Why this little girl? I have a 3 year old, also. Why do I think that I am so special nothing like this will happen to my family? How thankful I should be that my children have lived very healthy lives so far! Why do I think my family is invincible to bad things? Well, the realization is that we aren't. We haven't been lucky, either. God has blessed us thus far with the gift of health. I should be rejoicing daily and thanking Him profusely. But do I? Of course not.
Let's face it. I needed a wake-up call. And tonight...I got one. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I cannot get the little girl off my mind. And the sad thing is that she isn't the only small child going through something like this. There are children all over who are battling diseases and sicknesses. It's not rare. And my family is not invincible. Thank you Lord for reminding me how blessed I am and how thankful I should be.
Well, tonight I had a moment that hit me square in the face. It hit me hard. And it made me realize that I take everything I have for granted. I am not near as thankful as I should be, and I treat little petty things like major events. Guess I needed a reality check and that is exactly what I got.
You see, a family at our church is pleading for prayers for their sister. She is in ICU and very ill. She isn't much older than me, and she has young children at home like me. I have been praying several times a day for her, as well as checking her caringbridge site for updates at least 5-6 times a day. It has been devastating to this familiy, but their faith is strong and many people are crying out to God on her behalf. How thankful I should be every day for my health and the health of my family! However, I don't. I don't stop near enough and truly thank God for these blessings.
Tonight on the caringbridge update, the family asked us to continue to pray for their family member, but to also pray for a 3 year old little girl with cancer. At the end of the post they put a link to the young girl's caringbridge site.
As I sat and read the updates, looked at the pictures of the beautiful child, and read the comments that people are leaving for the family, I felt completely guilty. I sat and cried my eyes out. Why this little girl? I have a 3 year old, also. Why do I think that I am so special nothing like this will happen to my family? How thankful I should be that my children have lived very healthy lives so far! Why do I think my family is invincible to bad things? Well, the realization is that we aren't. We haven't been lucky, either. God has blessed us thus far with the gift of health. I should be rejoicing daily and thanking Him profusely. But do I? Of course not.
Let's face it. I needed a wake-up call. And tonight...I got one. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I cannot get the little girl off my mind. And the sad thing is that she isn't the only small child going through something like this. There are children all over who are battling diseases and sicknesses. It's not rare. And my family is not invincible. Thank you Lord for reminding me how blessed I am and how thankful I should be.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Catching Up...
Haven't done my part on keeping the blog current. My apologies to those few of you left who check it for new posts quite often (Grandpa). Lots has happened since the last real post about everyone starting a new school year.
Let's start with Kinsley. She LOVES school. She has blossomed more than I ever thought possible. In fact, there have been no tears at all at school (except for a few times in the gym for PE...but that has been worked out.) After knowing how shy and timid she is, her teacher was even afraid that she would be one who cried for the first month of Kindergarten....not so. She went in the first day with a big smile on her face and has loved it ever since. She even enjoys riding the bus from her school to mine in the afternoon, and if we are early in the mornings, she likes to ride the bus (however that hasn't happened too much : ) )She is already learning to read, which is amazing to me. The thing that I feared worst about Kindergarten is happening...my baby is growing up and maturing before my very own eyes. I am so proud of her. She has really come out of her shell...she still has a ways to go, but the progress is huge!
Karlie Ryan goes to Dayschool two days a week and thinks it's great! The other days she is still at Mrs. Carla's and Bobo's. She gets spoiled rotten there, and I love it. They are more like a third set of grandparents to the girls rather than a babysitter...something that is not easy to find. We are thankful for them. She is growing up very quickly, too. She sailed right through the terrible twos without them actually being so terrible. However, I am not yet convinced that threes are going to be quite as easy. She is incredibly independent, and very smart. She amazes me everyday with things that she says or does.
Both girls are excited about Christmas- as long as Santa doesn't come in the house. And if he HAS to come in the house to leave the presents, then he BETTER NOT wake us up. They are not big fans of Santa...when we saw him at the mall (from the 2nd floor) Karlie screamed "GETME OUT OF HERE! I WANT TO GO HOME!" for the next 20 minutes. It was quite funny.
Jamie has taken up a new hobby- hunting. Whew, who knew it required so much gear and money to go sit in a field and shoot an animal. Oh wait...we haven't shot one yet. Haven't even seen very many. I don't get it. But he loves it. So I am trying to be supportive even though I really don't understand this new hobby. I just ask him not to "shoot his eye out" every time before he goes. Ah, he also has made a bet with a few guys at work about not being allowed to cut their hair until April....I never thought he would make it this long because it always bothered him if it wasn't buzzed....but when money is involved I guess he can do it. So if you see him and he looks kind of shaggy...it's all in the name of $40.
I absolutely love my new job this year. Fourth grade is awesome. It has been a really good year. I enjoy the time that the girls and I get to spend together in the car on the way to school in the mornings. Quality time that I try not to take for granted. Our lives have been so busy since school started (isn't everyones?) . When we aren't gone or busy doing something, I am trying to rest as I have been exhausted lately...this is due to the fact that we are expecting again. Our third child is due this summer and I have had more sickness and exhaustion with this pregnancy than either of the girls'. Could that mean a boy? We don't know yet but I will be sure to keep you posted. We have had lots of ultrasounds so far with this baby because this pregnancy is being considered high risk. Apparently I have a genetic disorder that makes me prone to blood clots...so at anytime a blood clot could form and block the baby from getting the nutrients it needs to grow and survive. I am thankful to have made it to the 12 week mark, but I also have been told that with my condition, this pregnancy will not be out of the "danger zone" until the baby is born. So, please pray for a healthy pregnancy that results in a healthy baby.
I know this is long...sorry. Just lots to say to catch up from the past 3 months....
Our house is still on the market. We are getting very antsy about selling it because we have finally found another house. The house that my parents lived in while I was in college is for sale and we have a contract on it contigent upon the sale of our house. This all took place this week, so now we are more ready to sell than ever before. We need the right person to come look at our house...So if you know anyone looking in this area....send them our way!
I know I say this everytime, but I WILL do better about keeping up. I will try to update the pregnancy, house situation, Jamie's hair, etc....Ha Ha!
For now, I think this is WAAAAAAY too long, and wonder if anyone made it through the entire post before falling asleep from boredom?
Let's start with Kinsley. She LOVES school. She has blossomed more than I ever thought possible. In fact, there have been no tears at all at school (except for a few times in the gym for PE...but that has been worked out.) After knowing how shy and timid she is, her teacher was even afraid that she would be one who cried for the first month of Kindergarten....not so. She went in the first day with a big smile on her face and has loved it ever since. She even enjoys riding the bus from her school to mine in the afternoon, and if we are early in the mornings, she likes to ride the bus (however that hasn't happened too much : ) )She is already learning to read, which is amazing to me. The thing that I feared worst about Kindergarten is happening...my baby is growing up and maturing before my very own eyes. I am so proud of her. She has really come out of her shell...she still has a ways to go, but the progress is huge!
Karlie Ryan goes to Dayschool two days a week and thinks it's great! The other days she is still at Mrs. Carla's and Bobo's. She gets spoiled rotten there, and I love it. They are more like a third set of grandparents to the girls rather than a babysitter...something that is not easy to find. We are thankful for them. She is growing up very quickly, too. She sailed right through the terrible twos without them actually being so terrible. However, I am not yet convinced that threes are going to be quite as easy. She is incredibly independent, and very smart. She amazes me everyday with things that she says or does.
Both girls are excited about Christmas- as long as Santa doesn't come in the house. And if he HAS to come in the house to leave the presents, then he BETTER NOT wake us up. They are not big fans of Santa...when we saw him at the mall (from the 2nd floor) Karlie screamed "GETME OUT OF HERE! I WANT TO GO HOME!" for the next 20 minutes. It was quite funny.
Jamie has taken up a new hobby- hunting. Whew, who knew it required so much gear and money to go sit in a field and shoot an animal. Oh wait...we haven't shot one yet. Haven't even seen very many. I don't get it. But he loves it. So I am trying to be supportive even though I really don't understand this new hobby. I just ask him not to "shoot his eye out" every time before he goes. Ah, he also has made a bet with a few guys at work about not being allowed to cut their hair until April....I never thought he would make it this long because it always bothered him if it wasn't buzzed....but when money is involved I guess he can do it. So if you see him and he looks kind of shaggy...it's all in the name of $40.
I absolutely love my new job this year. Fourth grade is awesome. It has been a really good year. I enjoy the time that the girls and I get to spend together in the car on the way to school in the mornings. Quality time that I try not to take for granted. Our lives have been so busy since school started (isn't everyones?) . When we aren't gone or busy doing something, I am trying to rest as I have been exhausted lately...this is due to the fact that we are expecting again. Our third child is due this summer and I have had more sickness and exhaustion with this pregnancy than either of the girls'. Could that mean a boy? We don't know yet but I will be sure to keep you posted. We have had lots of ultrasounds so far with this baby because this pregnancy is being considered high risk. Apparently I have a genetic disorder that makes me prone to blood clots...so at anytime a blood clot could form and block the baby from getting the nutrients it needs to grow and survive. I am thankful to have made it to the 12 week mark, but I also have been told that with my condition, this pregnancy will not be out of the "danger zone" until the baby is born. So, please pray for a healthy pregnancy that results in a healthy baby.
I know this is long...sorry. Just lots to say to catch up from the past 3 months....
Our house is still on the market. We are getting very antsy about selling it because we have finally found another house. The house that my parents lived in while I was in college is for sale and we have a contract on it contigent upon the sale of our house. This all took place this week, so now we are more ready to sell than ever before. We need the right person to come look at our house...So if you know anyone looking in this area....send them our way!
I know I say this everytime, but I WILL do better about keeping up. I will try to update the pregnancy, house situation, Jamie's hair, etc....Ha Ha!
For now, I think this is WAAAAAAY too long, and wonder if anyone made it through the entire post before falling asleep from boredom?
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Candy canes and Christmas
So, I need to update...but that will have to wait for a day that I have some more time and feel inspired. Tonight I just want to share this story...
As the holiday season approaches, Jamie and I begin to prod the girls about things they really would like to have, as opposed to the "I want that!" for every commercial that comes on TV. So tonight we asked them, "What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?"
Kinsley already had 1 item in mind- an inexpensive digital camera for kids. (hmmm...that sounds possible.)
Karlie immediately responds "A candy cane- just one candy cane."
"A candy cane? Don't you want some toys or something to go with all your Barbies?"
"Nope. Just one candy cane is all I want."
Wow, was all I could think.
How wonderful to be so content with the things you already have. Maybe I could learn a few lessons from her.
As the holiday season approaches, Jamie and I begin to prod the girls about things they really would like to have, as opposed to the "I want that!" for every commercial that comes on TV. So tonight we asked them, "What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas?"
Kinsley already had 1 item in mind- an inexpensive digital camera for kids. (hmmm...that sounds possible.)
Karlie immediately responds "A candy cane- just one candy cane."
"A candy cane? Don't you want some toys or something to go with all your Barbies?"
"Nope. Just one candy cane is all I want."
Wow, was all I could think.
How wonderful to be so content with the things you already have. Maybe I could learn a few lessons from her.
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